Austin – With his beard, plaid shirts and ill-fitting pants, Tom Gregory is often mistaken for one of Austin’s many Hipsters. “People are like, ‘Dude, you live in a cardboard box. Badass. Way to downsize, bro.’ And I’m like, “I’m homeless.” It doesn’t help that Tom is carless and wears Salvation Army threads: He fits in well with the consciously unkempt and serially underemployed.

The confusion started several years ago when Tom stopped shaving. “They call me a Lumbersexual. I can’t afford a goddamned razor! Have you ever tried shaving with a soda can tab? Not pretty.”

Tom enjoys a Pabst Blue Ribbon or two when he can. But that only contributes to his troubles. “”People see me drinking that stuff and they assume I’m some trustafarian trying to keep it real. Are you kidding me? Tough to ask for spare change when they think you’re sitting on mad bank.”

Tom hopes that cleaning up his appearance will help people see him as the street bum he aspires to be. “Dress for the job you want, they say.”

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